Yeninko of the Umlaut

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Observations on the Playing of Cards and Other Activities at the Oaks Card Room in Emeryville, California.

1) The place seems to be an exact mirror of the demographics of the East Bay with the following exceptions
  • There are no women.
  • A disproportionate amount of people are missing digits or portions of digits.
  • Everyone looks like some sort of miscreant (smuggler, troglodyte, ne’er do well, etc.).

2) As evidenced by the man sleeping next to me as he played cards, it is possible to sleep and play cards simultaneously, and really, even do moderately well. I was very interested in asking him if this was a innate ability or a learned skill but didn’t want to wake him.

3) No one will be happy when you win except for that one guy and really, he won’t stay around long.

4) The food is very good. Though there is something pathetic about eating you food on a glorified TV food stand because you don’t want to leave the table for the 20 requisite minutes to eat like a human being.

5) Coffee is free!

6) If you are an average player, at least at the cheap tables, you are better than most of the people you are playing against.

7) The small Micronesian looking fellow with the wildly buck teeth is going to get so pissed when he loses a crappy hand he has been raising every round that he should have folded right off the bat. Also everyone will laugh when he storms away.

8) Asking the huge pear shaped dude ‘How does this all work’ will result in him explaining it over and over with a spitting lisp until you abruptly walk away.

9) It feels like a church sort of because there is a pulpit and a guy talking into a PA system the whole time.

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